The Sacred Heart Jesuit Community in Los Gatos, Northern California where I did my 30 day retreat is the infirmary of the Jesuit California Province. They are presently housing more than seventy Jesuits who most of them need medical attention. Most of the Jesuits here are retired from their ministries and averaging eighty years old and above. Many of them are in canes, wheelchairs, and walking trolleys. In my one month stay here, five Jesuits peacefully passed away. Jesuit writer Michael Buckley is also here, managing slowly his own “wheels”-chair from his room to the dining hall every meal. But surprisingly, this is one of the happiest and warmest Jesuit communities I’ve ever seen. They have grown old gracefully and it’s very consoling to see them every day at meal. It’s a reality check for me that years from now, this will also be my destiny.
The spirit of Ignatian indifference really lives in the hearts of these wonderful men of the Society who many years ago, in their youthful age as a Jesuit, have gifted the Church and their country their lives - with their talents, spirituality and presence. They are now in the sunset moments of their lives; they may no longer have the youthful Jesuit energy that I posses, yet they are one of my great source of strength and consolation during my retreat. Indeed, Jesuits don’t retire. They can still inspire people, especially young Jesuits like me, not to be afraid to surrender one’s self to the Lord and do God’s will. It is true … there is no real happiness outside the will of God. The Jesuits here in Los Gatos have silently taught me that reality. They are indeed sons of Ignatius of Loyola. When I close my eyes in prayer, the words of God the Father to Jesus re-echoes in my heart each time I remember these wonderful men … “They are my sons whom I am well pleased.”
I pray that God will also give me the grace to be like them when I grow old. They are not perfect people but it's good to emulate their lives. They are indeed my great “Lolos” (Grandfathers) who constantly supported us with their prayers, presence and good place to pray. I thank them for giving us a wonderful place to dwell and an "Ignatian air" to breathe during our retreat. There is indeed life and Ignatian spirit here in Sacred Heart Community.
I will leave my Jesuit brothers here in Sacred Heart with a grateful heart to God and to all of them. To remember these wonderful men is to remind me that Jesuit life is worth living and dying for. I do admire them.
I will bring home with me two things: 1) the grace I received in my retreat - the joy of being called by God to serve him as a Jesuit… and 2) the joy of being a member of this least Society of Jesus. That we are sinners yet called by God.
I have seen San Francisco but I can’t say, “I left my heart in San Francisco.” I have experienced a loving community here and I can truly say, “I have left my heart in Los Gatos.”
Thank you for praying for us during our retreat. It helped us a lot. – Willy Samson,SJ
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